Fun
Church Bulletin Bloopers:
- "For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs."
- "The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church."
- "Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 to 8:30 p.m. Please use the back door."
- "Anointing of the sick ... If you are going to be hospitalized for an operation, contact the pastor. Special prayer also for those who are seriously sick by request."
- Last song "and we will finish with...." - TAKE MY LIFE
- "Next weeks speaker will be found pinned up on the notice board"
Stupid Questions from Lawyers
The following questions by lawyers were taken from actual court documents in America:
• "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
• "Now doctor, is it not true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn’t know anything about it until the next morning?"
• Q: "What happened then?" A: "He told me, ‘I have to kill you because you can identify me.'" Q: "And did he kill you?"
• "Was it you or your brother that was killed in the war?
• "The youngest son, the twenty year old, how old is he?"
• "Were you alone or by yourself?"
• "Do you have any children or anything of that kind?"
• Q: "I show you exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture?" A: "That’s me." Q: "Were you present when he picture was taken?"
• "Were you present in court this morning when you were sworn in?"
• Q: "Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated ?" A: "By death." Q: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
• Q: "Do you know how far pregnant you are now?" A: "I’ll be three months on November 8th." Q: "Apparently then, the date of conception was August 8th? A: "Yes." Q: "What were you doing at that time?
• "So you were gone until you returned?"
• Q: "She had three children right?" A: "Yes." Q: "How many were boys?" A: "None." Q: "Were there any girls?"
• "Mrs. Jones, how many times have you committed suicide?"
• "You don’t know what it was, and you didn’t know what it looked like, but can you describe it?"
• Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?" A: "Yes." Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"
• Q: "Do you recall approximately the time that you examined the body of Mr. Edington at the Rose Chapel?" A: "The autopsy started about 8:30 p.m." Q: "And Mr. Edington was dead at that time?"